‘The Car Crash, An Odyssean Journey’

I built this ship, to take me far,

Away from home, closer to hope

I travel seas, wine-dark,

and in my desperate search gulped them all down,

but for what?

The promise of a better,

Greener land –

The emerald isles, home to my soul,

So many lives spent here.

Who knew in this one I would crash

upon the shore, much like Icarus,

reaching for something he could never own?

Honey, I built this ship

and for what?

To wreck, to wreck, oh,  to wreck…

For what?

To bring a terror from the east, sailing west…

Why?

It creeped in through the ship’s holes, now it’s

bringing it down, sinking,

sinking…

I am going down with this ship

Suffocating…

Drowning…

Dreaming.

It is all a dream

within a dream

within a car-ride. The streets are blue, and I am blue, and the night is young,

the journey is long, my vision blurs, I cannot steer-

I car-crash.

And then slowly, I emerge, out of the fire, in my red suit, as something different than

before.

I gulped down the sea, and for what?

To be thirstier than before.

After everything, the water gave me this?

The explosion scorches on, but I kind of like how it’s burning my face-

Catapulted again in the waking world I realise

I can no longer be myself

I have to fight with myself

As though my old self is the mighty beast Leviathan.

In order to come out on top

I must unlearn myself,

In my desperate struggle, swallow myself up

and spit it back out something other, broken-boned

from the journey into the unknown.

Is it too late to turn back now

after turning my back on everything I’ve ever known

or loved?

I must find it again, here.

Is this not everything I ever dreamed of?

I came here, conquered the seas, braved the tumultuous storms,

and for what?

This is not like my other lives, when the isles were my home,

The oracle did not lie, this journey would not be easy. Now I am

a foreigner. Outlander. Outsider.

Out, ill thoughts!

Now ask me again.

You came here, and for what?

This is my home.

Now say it in your mother tongue. How do you say home?

You came here, and for-

Forgot.